I cried and cursed as he satisfied himself, my head was banging and the room became blurry. I think he realized I was almost passing out, he suddenly stopped and tossed me aside like a smelly towel.
I'm the one that got away, best riddance.
(VideoBlocks)It was that kind of night, the one I just want to end real fast. It was the 30th day of March, a Good Friday.
Back to my current situation, from the bartender's perspective I'm a lonely girl out all by herself on a Friday night, wearing an all black ensemble that could pass as a mourning garb. I chuckled softly, shaking my head as I stared back at the bartender who looked at me in a weird manner, I had been sitting in front of him nursing a glass of Martini for almost three hours. I'm Oluwawemimo Palmer aka Mimi Palmer, the second child of the popular Leke Palmer's family and obviously the black sheep.
play I'm a lonely girl out all by herself on a Friday night, wearing an all black ensemble that could pass as a mourning garb.
(Shutterstock)
Chijioke
I never wanted to school in Delta state but my Mom insisted saying it's an opportunity to get to know her own side of the family. I was born in Delta state but grew up mostly in Lagos. Everything went well until I was home during 300 level harmattan semester break. Jay as he's known by all including my sister who was his friend was just a friend too until that March when I came home on break. I was out with my friends celebrating my nineteenth birthday, I was engrossed in a conversation with Memunah when I heard a baritone voice behind me and we all looked at him at once.
"Hello Ladies, sure you are having fun?" He asked.
"Hi Chijioke". I replied obviously pissed at the interruption. He was holding a bouquet of flowers and a bottle of wine, smiling sheepishly at me. I felt like giving him a hard knock on his head.
"Happy birthday Mimi, the prettiest flower in the Palmer's garden". He said, as he made his way towards me, placing the flowers and wine on the table. Memunah and Tolu were looking at him obviously star struck. He was very handsome and charming, so I couldn't blame them.
"Can I join you? Your sister told me where to find you ".
I couldn't say no, seeing as my friends were fully concentrated on the guy. I just nodded and we continued from there.
Falling For Jay
It was not hard falling for Chijioke Ugwu, he was witty, funny, well bred and he looked like a movie star. My sister tried to warn me to take it slowly and get to know him first but my pretty head was already in the clouds. My birthday was on the 7th of March and on the 15th I decided to give him a chance in my life. I was head over heels in love, or what I thought love felt like.
He'd call me every opportunity he got, he was working with an IT firm somewhere in Ikoyi and I lived in Lekki. I had to go to back to school towards the end of the month, the Presidential elections were fast approaching and I needed to get my clearance done before they declared the holidays. Jay surprised me two days after I arrived in school by paying me a visit. He called me and told me to come to Asaba where he was lodged in an hotel, my school was in Warri but I travelled down to Asaba to see him. I was so happy to see him, we had our first kiss and my knees gave way.
We went to dinner at the hotel's restaurant, and retired early to our room. It was my first time sleeping on the same bed with a man. I was never experimental like other girls my age and only had my first kiss when I was sixteen. I was a virgin and I planned to be that way until my wedding night. Jay had other plans, we were cuddling and touching each other but I never wanted it to go further. Jay tried getting me naked but I refused, he became pissed and stormed out of the room slamming the door behind him.
There I was lying in my pyjamas on a strange bed, in an hotel and my supposed boyfriend left me all alone just because I didn't want to have sex. I was in a dilemma, I thought Jay was different, he seemed coolheaded and quite respectful but why the sudden change I wondered? I stayed up until past three in the morning, Jay wasn't back and I decided to sleep leaving the door unlocked.
He crept in later in the morning, looking so dishevelled. He reeked of smoke and alcohol, he wasn't drunk but obviously tipsy. He ignored me and slept all through the day, while he slept I amused myself with telenovelas as the elections were conducted. Later on, he apologized for leaving me without calling and we made up.
He tried getting into my panties but I refused then he snapped. He slapped me and I was still in shock when he tore my clothes as we wrestled. He was way bigger compared to my petite frame, he raped me. I can almost taste the blood that filled my mouth from the brutal blows he dealt me. I cried and cursed as he satisfied himself, my head was banging and the room became blurry. I think he realized I was almost passing out, he suddenly stopped and tossed me aside like a smelly towel.
playThe Morning After
I cried my eyes out, I felt pains all over my body. I was sore from his forced entry, the sheets were stained with blood, my blood. I think I must have passed out from exhaustion. I made my way to the bathroom, cleaned and dressed myself up. He walked into the room and knelt down, he begged me to forgive him and I cried harder. I couldn't see past what happened, I left for Warri...
I reasoned he had a point, I should have allowed him have his way. After all he was and still is my boyfriend and I loved him nonetheless. I couldn't open up to anyone about what happened, I couldn't tell my sister. I had stopped picking his calls and blocked him on all social media platforms...
Today
Today makes it exactly three years since that night Jay raped me. I can still remember him tossing me contraceptive pills saying; "Take this ASAP! I don't want you to get pregnant".
I didn't return to Lagos until a whole year after that incident, I and Jay had settled our differences and we were cool. Two weeks to my arrival he came to see me in school and I didn't hear from him since he went back to Lagos. He stopped picking or returning my calls, he'd read my messages on BBM without replying. I was writing my final exams so I didn't pay much attention to it until I got to Lagos.
He sent me a text via Whatsapp telling how he was sorry about everything that he was already in Canada. I was beyond surprised, he said he'd call me later but never did. That was two years ago, I still feel like beating myself up whenever I think of how naive and foolish I was. He only used me to satisfy his selfish whim. I'm at this bar celebrating two years of living without him, a glass of Martini and diced apples in one hand, memories of our rendezvous in my heart.
playI heard he's in town with his wife, a lady he had been dating while he was with me. I wanted my pound of flesh but when I saw her, she was heavily pregnant. I couldn't possibly hurt an expectant mother.
I hope Jay is happy with her and I hope they'd have a beautiful daughter. I wish them well but I know karma will come knocking... I never wanted to lose myself in such a way but it happened, I can't change that. Maybe it was his fault for not being patient enough or mine for being so trusting. It doesn't change the fact that I'm broken and skeptical about finding someone new.
I paid the bartender and made my way out of the bar, I had been hurt but I finally found the good in goodbye. I am resuming at one of the fortune 500 companies in April, I am at the beginning of a great career, I shouldn't be saddled with such thoughts. I'm the one that got away, best riddance.
